The fix is almost never “relax.” It’s giving him something to do, something to lean on, or something to look at that isn’t the lens. The grooms below aren’t models. They just got handed a task, a dog, a letter, or a really good chair.
We pulled these straight from real L&L weddings and grouped them by what he’s actually doing, so you can show him (or your photographer) the exact setup you’re after. Find one you like, then click through to see the whole day. For more, wander through our Real Weddings directory.
Our Favorite Groom Poses From Real Weddings
Here’s the part where the stiffness disappears. We’ve sorted these by pose, so when one works for you, you can see how a few different grooms pulled it off. Tap any link to step into the full wedding.
The First Look
He’s already grinning and she hasn’t even reached him yet. That’s the whole case for shooting the first look from his side: you get his face doing something honest while she’s still a soft blur behind him under the covered portico.
See Emily and Justin’s Los Poblanos Estate Wedding →
Clayton holds it together at the end of a Sonoma vine row while Melissa comes up behind him, and the photographer keeps him sharp and her dreamy. If he’s a crier, this is the frame that catches it.
See Melissa and Clayton’s Sonoma Vineyard Wedding →
The Finishing Touches
Getting-ready shots are where grooms forget the camera exists, which is exactly why they work. Matthew, working a patent shoe onto his foot at the edge of the bed, isn’t posing at all. Hand him a real task and the stiffness leaves on its own.
See Erin and Matthew’s Lyman Estate Wedding →
Matt fastening his watch, head down, navy vest over a dotted tie. A wristwatch gives the hands a job and the photographer a reason to move in tight on the cuff.
See Stephanie and Matt’s Seaside Wedding →
Morten fastening a cuff link, suspenders up, watch and ring catching the light. Crop in close on the hands and the details carry the shot, no eye contact required.
See Roselina and Morten’s French Chateau Wedding →
Steven knotting a blush tie with his collar still flipped up and a grin he isn’t bothering to hide. Catch him talking to someone off to the side and you get the smile without the say-cheese version of it.
See Kira and Steven’s Northern California Winery Wedding →
Benjamin checking his bow tie in a gold-framed mirror under a Paris chandelier, shot over his own shoulder. Working through the mirror hands you two of him and a whole lot of room.
See Rachel and Benjamin’s Paris Wedding →
The straight-on version: Nathan squares up to the lens, both hands up at his collar, in front of Glen Manor’s paned windows. Hands on the tie keep him busy enough to look at the camera without locking up.
See Jaclyn and Nathan’s Newport Wedding →
Hands in His Pockets
The reliable one. Hands in pockets, weight on one leg, eyes off to the side, an exposed-brick wall doing the rest. Kyler’s full-length take against the warm brick at Neo on Locust is about as foolproof as a groom portrait gets.
See Kyler and Andrew’s Saint Louis Wedding →
Warmer light, looser shoulders. Adam tucks his hands in, turns toward a window in his navy waistcoat, and lets the daylight catch a real smile. Pockets quietly solve the what-do-I-do-with-my-arms problem every single time.
See Madeleine and Adam’s Lakeside Wedding →
The Casual Lean
Give him something to lean on and he loosens up. Morten props against a vintage white convertible outside the chateau, ankles crossed, one hand clutching his jacket front, looking every bit the part. The car is the prop, but the lean is what sells it.
See Roselina and Morten’s French Chateau Wedding →
No car needed, a porch column works just as well. Nate leans into the white pillar at the Liriodendron mansion, ankles crossed, red tie bright against black. A railing, a doorway, a tree, anything to break the standing-at-attention line.
See Katelyn and Nate’s Liriodendron Estate Shoot →
Reading Her Letter
If you write him a note for the morning of, ask the photographer to be there when he reads it. This groom, cream suit against a weathered barn wall, is genuinely lost in the page, with no performance in it.
See this Southern Rustic Wedding →
Eric’s version is staged a touch more deliberately: seated in a worn chair under a Texas flag, navy suit, cowboy boots, card in hand. The setup gives the read a backdrop, and the burgundy bow tie keeps it from getting too solemn.
See Jammie and Eric’s Rustic Texas Wedding →
With the Pet
The dog will upstage him, and that’s the point. Bryce stands easy in a gray three-piece while his dark Lab sits front and center in a pale bow, both of them against an old Pennsylvania stone farmhouse. Best man, clearly.
See Megan and Bryce’s Bucks County Wedding →
David crouches down nose-to-nose with the pup in his navy-and-white ceremony attire at this intimate Singapore celebration. Getting low to the animal’s level beats hoisting it up at arm’s length.
See Elizabeth and David’s Singapore Wedding →
Josh just holds his scruffy dog up by the cake table at the Barn at Glistening Pond and lets the moment go where it goes, which here means a face-lick under a #HunkaBurning sign. Candid wins when an animal is involved, because the animal never got the memo.
See Sara and Josh’s Boho Barn Wedding →
And if your venue happens to be the Rose & Goat Retreat, you bring the goat. Tucked into the crook of a navy suit, floral collar and a little black necktie of its own, this kid is the boutonniere. Not every couple can pull this off. These two can.
See Emily and Nathaniel’s Rose & Goat Retreat Wedding →
Gazing Out the Window
Shot from behind, no face at all, and it still lands. Josh stands at a floor-to-ceiling window over Long Island City, one hand in his pocket, the Queensboro Bridge and the skyline filling the glass. When the view is this good, let him take it in and shoot his back.
See Jill and Josh’s Art Deco New York Wedding →
Sunk Into a Leather Chair
Trey drops into a worn cognac club chair in his gray three-piece and teal tie, an arm slung over each side, a striped sock on show. A good chair does the posing for you. He just has to sit in it like he owns the room.
See Katie and Trey’s Nashville Wedding →
Flashing the Suit Lining
Ben holds his jacket wide open to show off a wildly patterned lining, a green bow tie tying the whole look together, grinning straight down the lens. If he splurged on a fun detail nobody else will ever see, this is the pose that lets him show it off.
See Amanda and Ben’s Winter Wedding →
Holding Up a Note
A card held up to the camera reading I can’t wait to marry you, black tux gone soft behind it. Alex’s note pulls double duty: a sweet frame on its own, and a keepsake she gets to open later. Hand him a line worth holding and let him grin behind it.
See Alex and Alonso’s La Caille Wedding →
Holding Her Bouquet
Park the bouquet in his hands for a minute. Against Derric’s charcoal vest, the blush-and-cream roses and trailing greenery pop the way they never would in a wide shot, and you get a flower detail and a groom shot in one frame.
See Rebekah and Derric’s Smoker Farm Wedding →
From Above
Sometimes the move is to make him small. Jeffery stands alone in a gray suit against a weathered, ivy-laced wall at Livernano, framed by terracotta pots and a single recessed window. Let the location carry the weight and tuck him slightly off-center inside it.
See Christina and Jeffery’s Tuscany Wedding →
Posing With the Golf Club
At a country club, you lean into it. Steve holds his driver out toward the lens while the photographer racks focus onto the club head and lets him blur out behind it. A hobby prop gives a restless groom something real to do, and the trick turns it into art.
See Amanda and Steve’s Maryland Country Club Wedding →
The Moment It Hits Him
And the one you can’t pose for. Jeff, hands pressed to his mouth, eyes brimming, watching her come down the aisle at The Pointe. Tell your photographer to forget you exist for thirty seconds and stay on his face. This is the frame everyone is fighting back tears over later.
See Libbs and Jeff’s Gold and Glitter Wedding →
FAQs
What should a groom do with his hands in photos?
Give them a job. Pockets are the easy answer, but a cuff link to fasten, a lapel to hold, a drink, a dog, or his own watch all beat letting them hang. Idle hands are what make a groom look stiff, so the whole trick is making sure they always have somewhere to be.
How can a camera-shy groom look natural in pictures?
Stop asking him to pose and give him something to do instead. Walking, leaning, reading a note, fixing his tie, or talking to someone off-camera all pull his attention off the lens, and that’s when the real expression shows up. The best groom photos usually happen when he half-forgets he’s being photographed.
What are the best groom poses for getting-ready photos?
The ones built around a real task: lacing his shoes, fastening his watch, knotting his tie, or fixing his bow tie in a mirror. Each one gives the photographer a tight detail shot and the groom an excuse not to perform. Aim for the few minutes when he’s genuinely focused on getting dressed, not standing around waiting.
Should the groom be in the first look photos?
Yes, and don’t only shoot it from the bride’s side. Catching the first look from the groom’s angle, with her blurred behind him, records his reaction in real time, which is often the most honest face he makes all day. If he’s a crier, this is exactly where it happens.
How do you pose a groom who feels awkward standing alone?
Lean him on something or sit him down. A porch column, a doorway, a vintage car, or a deep leather chair all give him a place to put his weight and instantly kill the standing-at-attention look. Props and furniture quietly do half the posing for you.
